The Thaw

In English we've been talking ecocritical. We recently had to reflect on our relationship with nature. At the time, my relationship with nature was going through a rough patch. April was windy and cloudy and forty or fifty degrees, which is completely unfair after one glorious week of sunny seventies in mid-March. Thus, in my reflection, I had decided that I was not very close with nature.

But wait! Yesterday, after my silk training (*cough*shamelesspromotion*cough*goseeCHICAGO*cough*) yesterday, I noticed that it was in the high seventies; It was sunny; It was breezy. I went for a short walk outside before driving home, and even after the thirty-minute drive back home and the lunch I ate indoors, I went back out to my yard to relax (instead of hide in my air-conditioned house like I normally would). Now, my relationship with nature is in a honeymoon period. The weather is being very good to me, so it's easier for me to love the weather.

In our class discussion of relationships with nature, I figured out that I'm not driven away from nature out of fear of giant animals or fear of dangerous people hiding in the landscape. Instead, my biggest problem is adverse weather... specifically... the cold (i lived in 95-degree, sunny, humid, muggy Italy for three weeks this summer and it honestly hardly bothered me!). If my feelings toward nature strongly depend on the temperature, then where does my role with the great outdoors stand? I believe that I'm not the only one who has a constantly morphing, fluctuating relationship with nature. I bet yours changes frequently, too. What's the factor that affects how you feel toward nature? Weather? Terrain? Bugs?

Finally... earthy song recommendations... it's almost Earth Day, and I think there's no better way to celebrate (anything, not just Earth Day) than with a lovely playlist. Enjoy!

•"Down to Earth" by Peter Gabriel
•"Sprout and the Bean" by Joanna Newsom
•"Woods" by Bon Iver
•"Thistled Spring" by Horse Feathers

(if you have song recommendations, GIVE THEM TO ME =] !!)

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

I'm reading some great literature in English, but that is something I can usually count on having around. Instead, I'd like to take a festive break.

So I've been listening to a whole lot of Christmas music lately. No, I'm not one of those people who prepares for Christmas the second Halloween ends... I'm worse. I was Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer for Halloween. I'm not sorry.

Annually, I'm faced with a very serious problem. Because I listen to Christmas music nonstop for two months straight each year, I'm always desperate for something new. I can only tolerate hearing Jingle Bell Rock so many times before, well, I start doubting it's really such a swell time to go riding in a one-horse sleigh.

Anyway, I went on a hunt. First I felt disappointed in Bob Dylan. Then I studied for AP Psych (which helped me get a 95% on that chapter test!). Then I turned off the iPod and did some homework...

I've begun to pay much more attention to perspective lately. In class today, we touched on Otherism. In Reading Lolita in Tehran, there's a scene where a stereotypical Muslim girl is compared to a stereotypical Christian girl. The professor says that one of these girls is a virgin, and the other is not. You might ask, "Which girl is which?" or you might say, "Huh, why would he point out that girls of his own religion are not virgins?" (like I'll admit I did. I went to Catholic school for nine years. According to all the teachers, nuns, priests, and fellow parishioners, a Christian woman better be a virgin, unless, of course, she's married.) According to Yassi's professor, because the Muslim girl is a virgin and the Christian girl was the "other," then the Christian girl must not be a virgin. I made the same mistake, but reversed the roles. Unsurprisingly, we each named the girl who is "one of us" as the virgin.

Then I began to think about other layers of otherism... What about people you categorize as "us," who don't actually fit every characteristic on the checklist of "us"-ness? This is how my post is all related to Christmas. From the point of view of us Christmas-celebrators who have heard the story time and time again, the "joy to the world," "glory to the newborn king," and "tidings of comfort and joy," make us believe that everyone's happy with Jesus arriving. The lyrics from this song, from Joseph's perspective, offer the possibility that someone wasn't overjoyed by this situation, or rather, that this poor guy felt pretty insecure about it all. Joseph's wife-to-be was expecting a baby, and all he knew for sure was that it wasn't because of him. Rather than assume that Joseph believed Mary easily and "heaven and nature sang" and "all was calm and all was bright," "Joseph, Who Understood" made me stop and think that it might be more difficult to believe that the son of God is being born when, from your point of view, it just looks like your girlfriend is unfaithful. Just like it's hard to believe that a girl of a different religion, whether it's Islam of Christianity, values abstinence as much as you do, because she's "the other."

So I'm ready for the holidays. I found new music, I analyzed it more than any normal listener should, and then I made these and brought them to my Express concert last night! I replaced all the butter with applesauce, poured the batter in a brownie pan instead of formed cookies, and baked for 20 min instead. Yummy and fat-free cookie bars! I hope you've all had or are having great holidays!

Managing Lately

Last week Carl Wilkens came to speak to my class. Before his visit, I had a very basic understanding of the Rwandan genocide -- just dates, rough numbers, definitions of Hutu and Tutsi -- so, in all honesty, I hardly considered it important. But this genocide happened in my own lifetime; the years I associate with my early childhood, others will associate with that. Wilkens really did open my eyes to that piece of history, and I'm thankful for my new appreciation of this history.

You may wonder why Wilkens's visit resonated with me so much. Think of what he has done, and then compare my own experiences. I've never set foot in Rwanda. I've never lived the midst of a genocide. I've never taken on responsibility for an orphanage. On that level, I guess I can't relate to his stories. But I have looked at a situation with positive eyes, and seeing someone else do just that and succeed comforted me. I have had doubts about my optimism. Maybe I'm just stupid and naïve. Especially this week (Warning: Next five sentences may follow "irritating rant" format!) I've been pretty swamped. Yes, I finally got my first batch of college applications turned in, but the next deadline (November 15 for CC, for anyone who's curious) is creeping up fast, and school has not relented in the least. The end of the quarter was just a time for me to find out my current grades and feel the pressure of what marks I have to maintain. Express, one of the choirs I sing in, is starting Christmas Season, so I have 2-and-a-half-hour reheasals every day after school. On top of that, Variety Show auditions are Monday, and with so many different numbers (such as the ones I've just linked) to rehearse I haven't gotten home before 8 p.m. yet this week.

I was just going through blogs on my reader account, and I came across this one. Emily reminded me of Mr. Wilkens's visit, and how inspired I felt after listening to him. I'm gonna emulate Wilkens (very consciously this week, though it wouldn't be such a bad thing to do all the time). I'm going to accept some things that I cannot change and trust that I will reap the best possible results if I work hard. My schedule this week isn't gonna change, but I can get through it, and I can enjoy it if I look at the situation the right way. Thanks, Carl Wilkens, for making this all manageable.